Okay, I tried to be more specific and, hopefully, more compelling. I usually don’t have much trouble writing pretty good queries, but for some reason this one was a lot harder. I guess partly because there are so many plot threads/backstory (not IN the manuscript, just stuff that I know and was trying to include in the query) that I was having trouble figuring out WHAT to include and what not to include. (And if it seems longer than some people’s queries, that’s because I do it deliberately. I seem to have a MUCH better track record making my query letter blurbs 2-3 paragraphs.)
Anywho, any and all comments welcome. As long as you don’t make me cry. 😉
Maiden. Mother. Crone. One witch from an unbroken line holds the potential to serve as the Triple Goddess’s Vessel. Another will commit any act necessary to control her. Even murder.
18-year-old Briana McRae never dreamed the sudden deaths of her parents would unleash a closet full of family skeletons and relatives she never knew existed. But as she grows closer to the newfound aunt and cousin who loathe each other, it becomes obvious that someone is manipulating her with a mystical family heirloom, hoping to force her onto a path of dark magic and blood sacrifice.
While Briana learns to use her abilities as a witch, she uncovers a web of treachery leading back decades. Everything seems to hinge on the night she was born nineteen years earlier, when her parents fled Boston after discovering her aunt Carey would stop at nothing–not even sacrificing her second daughter–to possess the Vessel for herself. In a final confrontation with her aunt on All Hollows Eve, Briana’s fear and loathing for Badb, the darkest Aspect of the three, nearly allow Carey to gain immortality and untold power. Only by accepting her fate as the Vessel–and acknowledging that darkness serves to balance light–can Briana succeed in stopping her aunt’s decades-long reign of dark magic and murder.
Hope this one has less suck! 😉